Behold!

The bike o' my recent fantasies! The Trek 7.2 FX. I'm total high school and have a picture and the spec sheet printed out and hanging on my wall.

I finally made it to the local bicycle shop this Saturday and took a look around. They had a ton of bikes and really I only had my list of complaints about the current one, but a nice fellow named Michael came to help. He was smaller than me with comfy looking sandals and white socks that somehow didn't make him look dorky. He was friendly and quiet, and seemed to be physically worn out, but in that good way. Like he had just gotten of the job of riding twenty miles uphill and now he was chilling with his venerable homeboys. I was at ease around him, which is rare as I usually get defensive and nervous when someone is peddling multi-hundred dollar purchases.

He had me hold his plastic water bottle as he untangled the little red number you see above from some of the others after I explained my general situation and did a bit of belly-achin'. Being used to The Caddy like I am (one of the many terms used to describe my current bike, "Killer" being another) and then simply lifting this beauty, I was already impressed. Then he started getting into the features. Quick shifters up on the handlebars (a trigger style for one direction, then a throttle style for the other), tiny high pressure tires, brakes that did not depend on the chain, etc. And lordy was it small.

I was content to just look at it (and lift it up repeatedly in wonder), but I got to take it for a test spin up and down one of the nearby roads. I felt silly riding a bike with both the girlfriend and the salesman watching, but as soon as I turned the corner it all went away. It was akin to piloting only an old sailboat before, and then being handed a jet ski. Not that one is inherently better than the other, just very different. Any bike works for commuting to work; don't let me discourage you. Mine just tried to kill me and weighs a ton.

I made sure to go off some curbs to test one of the most annoying things about The Caddy: it falls like a ton of bricks. Just recently (as you'll see in the second part of Good Lord, coming soon) it even broke it's own fender after rolling off some (admittedly) nasty curbs. A bike should not damage itself after crawling off anything curb-height. The new bike bounced off the curb very nearly like I was stepping off it naturally. A stretch sidewalk had been turned into jagged rubble by something or other and I rolled through it with ease, not like I was going to shake my spine out of my body.

Then a straightaway! I quickly jumped up the gears, again surprised at how smooth it all was. The Caddy has three gears, and nothing short of already going about nineteen miles an hour makes going from second to third gear easy or smooth. The bike made no noise except for the tires on the surface of the pavement. I had a tiny scare when I pedaled backwards to slow down and nothing happened! Then I applied the much better system of hand brakes and slowed enough to turn around and head back.

I didn't want to get off it, but Kasey and Michael were hanging out in front of the shop waiting for my return. Handing it back over to him and following it back into the shop I asked about racks and panniers, warning I had no idea how to pronounce "panniers" before I said it. Apparently I did okay, as it has two pronunciations which I take to be the true one, and the Americanized one. I said it the latter way, with a slight North-West accent. Both rack and pannier were cheaper than I thought, and if I let them know it advance they'll even install 'em for me.

So as you can tell and guess, I'm all hella pumped. I see wet streets and I think about learning how to drift on the new bike. I day dream about how much my average MPH will increase. I giggle thinking about parking it here in my office with me. I even contemplate painting it and other such projects. Problem is I'm poor right now, so I can't get it. Even with trade-in. Even selling blood and semen. Whether together or separate. I, your lowly blogger, must do something he sucks at: He must save.

If there happens to be any corporations reading this, and they want to sponsor me, I will wear your company logo wherever you want, and I do mean wherever. ;)

Okay, I need to think about work stuff. Peace!

- David